office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
mondays should just be called national damage control day
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Randomize
