he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
