if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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