I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize