why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
is it fun? or sober?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
