I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize