Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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