haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
