I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
