i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
My balls are so social today.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
