Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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