Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
