you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
