nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
