Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
