I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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