is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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