Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
should my penis look like a turkey
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize
