Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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