No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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