I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
