you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
only you would photoshop your dick
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
