Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
