remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
