We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
