ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
whose ass print is on the piano?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
