U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
