i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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