hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
