i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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