so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
