no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
