weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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