Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Terrible idea I love it
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
