Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
