The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
