i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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