just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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