Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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