I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
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