Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
