Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Randomize
