garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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