No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize