I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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