dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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