Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Randomize