just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
you are never too drunk for berry picking
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Let the clothes fall where they may.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
