I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
