Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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